spooky

today an odd thing happened. it was around 1 or 1:30 and i had given the baby his bottle, put him down for a nap, and as i was settling in next to him or maybe had even dozed off, i heard a woman's voice in our upstairs hall. it startled me. my cat frankie was on the bed w/ us and he even woke up and turned his head towards the bedroom door rather quickly. the door was closed, btw..

i thought i heard a door close. i felt a bit frightened, so i stayed in my spot for a few ... then decided to get up to see if someone was there. i looked out the window first to see if the front door to the outside was open or if anyone was on the street.... just in case the voice came from outside. no one. the street was empty.

so i opened the door, looked towards the tv room, that door was closed. inched forward and looked into the baby's room window that opens to the hall, the door was closed and i saw no one. i called out..... but nothing. i stood there for a few and then decided to go to the stairs to see if i could hear or see anyone. i got to the stairs, looked down to the area under the stairwell that sorta sees into the sitting area downstairs and i heard nothing. i called out "is someone there.... hello". nothing. i heard no sounds and no one called back to me.

i felt afraid and remembered that i had left the back door unlocked. i figured it would be easier for hubby when he came home from work... never figuring i'd be afraid of someone coming in.

i head back to the bedroom, close the door and wished i knew where the key was.... but i didn't. i actually found myself feeling fear that someone was in the house. then i wondered... ok, it sounded like a woman's voice... maybe someone from my FILs family had sent one of the maid's here.... but why wouldn't they hear me and why had i heard them upstairs?

i went and sat back down on the bed... eventually snuggling into naief who was asleep next to me.... and i dozed off. the next thing i know, it's 2 and hashim comes in to the room. i told him to wake me in another hour or so because i needed to get up and such..... forgetting what had happened and what i had heard.

only tonight, when almost ready for bed did i remember. weird.... because i've been afraid in this house before... afraid that a spirit was here. yesterday when i was downstairs washing dishes, i kept seeing something outta the corner of my eye to my right. every time i'd turn that way, there was nothing moving or nothing there that would catch my eye. i've had this happen before in various rooms. i've worried, but try to dismiss it. i have felt fear in my own bedroom w/ the baby... remember when i said that i felt something in the room w/ us, but felt better when the baby smiled and laughed at whatever it was.... since it is now gone. i've also felt something in the baby's room..... which i don't like.

i don't even like to talk about it.... think about it.... allow my mind to go there. i've always had this knack for feeling something odd - sometimes even seeing things, sensing something bad before it happens, sensing things around me.... even had an event when i was young.... but each time, i feel scared, not refreshed by it or it doesn't feel calm.

who called out today? why did my cat hear it but no one was there? should i fear it....???? because today i also heard what sounded like my husband's studio door closing and things moving about in there..... i asked him if anything was missing, nothing is. he thinks i heard him coming home.... but i asked if he called out to me.... no. did he come upstairs and go into one of the rooms? no.

you know... my MIL told me that i should play the Quran in the baby's room... for it's where Satiya stayed... the maid that did black magic or so we think. and now... that room is where my baby will sleep. i've slept in there and felt afraid.... couldn't even allow myself to put my back to the door, still can't.

i think i'll play the Quran tomorrow.