a funny

AN ITALIAN BOY'S CONFESSION


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> 'Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl'.
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> The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano ?'
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> 'Yes, Father, it is.'
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>
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> 'And who was the girl you were with?'
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> 'I can't tell you, Father, I don't want to ruin her reputation'
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> Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as
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> well tell me now.
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> Was it Maria Minetti?'
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> 'I cannot say.'
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>
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> 'Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?'
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> 'I'll never tell.'
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> 'Was it Nin a Capelli?'
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> 'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her..'
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>
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> 'Was it Cathy Piriano?'
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> 'My 2 lips are sealed.'
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>
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> 'Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?'
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> 'Please, Father, I cannot tell you. '
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>
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> The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, Joey
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> Pagano, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You
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> cannot be an altar boy for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.'
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>
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> Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and
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> whispers,
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> 'What'd you get?'
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>
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> 4 months vacation and five good leads.

afternoon funnies

Thanksgiving Divorce

A man in Jacksonville calls his son in San Diego the day before Thanksgiving and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams. We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Denver and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this,"

She calls Jacksonville immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says, "they're coming for Thanksgiving and paying their own way."

Thanksgiving funnies

Maxine is my hero! ;)