Sunday is the baby's one month birthday.... he'll no longer be a newborn but will now be an infant. Not sure that it makes a huge difference, but I'm starting to see changes in him. For one, he's starting to focus better, his motor skills are in full swing, he's eating a lot more, loves to sit up (w/ my support of course) and watch the goings-on around him, and is developing a small bit of his very stubborn personality....ok, maybe a large bit. :)
One big thing that will happen this Sunday is his circumcision. I'm dreading it. I know it only takes a few minutes, but the thought of him having the pain, even for that long, is more than I can bear. My husband's brother had the surgeon videotape the surgery and I think Hashim wants to do the same, but I really can't imagine it. I guess it's a guy thing. But really, in thinking about it, who would want to see such a thing once they get older?!! What guy would want to see that being done to him as a baby? My husband's brother thinks it's soooo cool and is very proud of the fact that he had it videotaped, but, really, I see no point in it. But... then again, maybe I'm missing something.
Things have been going well, for the most part. The baby has a lot of gas and cries from it a lot late at night, but I think it's getting better... altho, I say that and then it gets bad again... so w/ time, I know it'll pass... and once he starts rolling over it's supposed to considerably lesson... so I wait for the day. I'm dead tired. Sometimes late in the night (or the wee hours of the morn.), I find that I can barely keep my eyes open to feed him. I try to keep things as quiet as possible when he wakes up for early morn. feedings so that he won't wake up entirely cuz the little bugger is difficult to get back to sleep.
One morn. I learned my lesson the hard way... I think I talked to him a little too much and then changed his diaper (which is a big no no when he wakes up unless you have no other choice).... after that, he refused to go to sleep, so I spent a good hour 1/2 rocking him in my arms and trying to get him to calm down so he'd drift back to sleep. And once he's fallen asleep in my arms, putting him down on the bed is not so easy because as soon as I move my arms, he starts complaining and usually wakes up. He loves to fall asleep on me though and most days I can't deny him.... but after a while it kills my back and my arms and after two months, he'll expect it all the time, so I'm working on getting him to fall asleep on his own, but it's hard. He loves to sleep next to me and since he's a little angel.... well, you know what I'm gonna say... it's tough.
The hubby has been doing a pretty good job in helping me out, but he can sometimes be a big grouch at 3 and 4 a.m.... so I often find it easier to do things myself. And... when I wake him up in the wee hours, it's hard for him to wake up and if I say something, he usually doesn't understand me. I always wished for a deep sleep like that and have never had it... so I guess it's a good thing now. I've noticed that the baby is a light sleeper like me, which isn't a good thing, let me tell ya! But, it helps me out because whenever I hear anything from the baby, I wake up immediately.... so I find that I don't feel so afraid.
The in-laws... well, I've been staying at our house and away from that unwanted stress. I find it easier to be here and to do things on my own. Even if I make mistakes... at least I learn from them. I do things differently than this culture does and find that it isn't looked at as a positive thing. And it's not just the in-laws that make the comments... I find that some women feel like it's their duty or think it's ok to butt in and give their opinions about things that are really none of their business. I can't tell ya how many times I've been told not to put the baby in an infant car seat! If I saw things from their point of view, I'd be hurting my baby and damaging his bones, as well as bruising him. And.. I've heard the same about carrying the baby in my arms.... and from not wrapping the baby like a mummy.... so many ppl say the same thing... I'm hurting him or will make his bones bad. When I hear this, all I want to say is... "ok... do you see all the ppl from the West crippled?... NO! So leave me the hell alone, ok!!" This also goes for holding the baby. I'm told over and over that I should only hold him so that he's on his side w/ his arms pulled into the front. If I don't pull them into the front, they tell me that he'll grow up w/ his arms/shoulders bent backwards.... it's hard to explain what I mean here or what's told to me, but it's not true. I know that the baby won't grow up w/ his shoulders bent backwards.... and plus... I don't want his shoulders pulled inwards anyhow. I know that my baby isn't going to break when I hold him... but many seem to think he will.
But... I don't say anything. I mind my tongue. I will say though, my niceness in this area is running thin and it may not be too far down the road that I make my opinions known and when I do... well, I know it won't be looked at as a positive thing. So be it though.
I found out from my hairdresser that most of the British don't circumcise their sons... and a lot of ppl in the U.S. don't do it.... and Indians don't do it.... so I was talking to my husband and told him that we shouldn't do it! ;) Here he didn't want to neuter our cat but he can't leave well enough alone and not circumcise his son... I find it funny and love to tease him about it. Not that I wouldn't do this, because I know it's better for the child and a lot cleaner, but.... the thought of it... well, it hurts my heart to know that he might be in pain and how it will probably hurt to have it done. But I guess w/ the cat, it was different. At least we're not removing the baby's testicles! ;) :)
One of my SILs told me that her son slept thru it, which I think is a bare face lie. Maybe he was asleep prior to it being done, but I know a child/baby wouldn't sleep w/ that type of pain. I've seen my baby sleeping prior to having his blood drawn and as soon as they start to take it, he screams in pain. Now... you tell me how they can circumcise a child and he not feel it because he's sleeping???? I don't believe her. I can't stand it when ppl lie for the sake of lying. Does she think I'm stupid?! I think she does.
Anyway... today's been good so far altho I got vomited on earlier today, and I mean so much so that all of my clothes were drenched in it. Poor little guy. He didn't cry... he just matter of factly threw up all over me... and all over himself. Gosh, I've never seen a baby throw up like that before... the stuff just spewed outta him.... like a little volcano! ;) It kept coming and coming. I found that I got mad at my husband for feeding him too much.... the baby kept crying and he thought he was hungry, when he actually needed his diaper changed! So.... I got good and covered. It's okay though cuz I know it won't be the last time... and when it's your child... it's okay.
Happy day everyone.