Monday, May 11, 2009

Why Parents Drink

A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an
Envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to 'Dad..'

With the worst premonition he opened the envelope

with trembling hands he read the letter.

Dear Dad:

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.

But I knew you would not approve of her because of all her piercings, tattoos, tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am. But it's not only the passion....Dad, she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy.

She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.

In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better. She deserves it.

Don't worry Dad. I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.

Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can

get to know your grandchildren.

Love, Your Son, John

PS. Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.

I Just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a Report card - That's in my center desk drawer.

I love you.
Call me when it's safe to come home.


valerie lynn said...

Oh funny was that! Great joke but I had to say my heart was pounding as I read it thinking, Oh my Gosh my kids had better never ever do something like this to me!

Love you girl!

Angry In Oman said...


Chief Rock Chef said...


The Moody Minstrel said...

Oh, man...I think I lost a few sanity points reading that!

Um Naief said...

nough said!!! :)

Miss Fluff said...

Wow! LOL! That's a good distraction. I'm glad I found your blog again. I was doing a sweep, and realized I lost all of my links! So, I'm placing you on my blogs to follow list now. :)